mental health, Photography, Uncategorized

In My Mind

Life with ADD/ADHD is a difficult one to process. Most of the information out there is for children with ADD. But those children, they do not grow out of it, ADD follows them into adulthood. So, what does that look like?

It looks like yourself, attacking your own mind. It looks like a perfectionist hovering over you, giving you ideas of what to do. One after another. 

It looks like taking a moment to go crazy. If only you could get the thoughts to stop. 

It’s taking a moment to close your eyes and breathe, to remind yourself you are okay. 

It’s going to do something you want to do. 

And then having another thought distract you entirely. Leaving you to wonder what to do next. 

It’s holding yourself together to not break down. 

It’s contemplating giving up. 

You grab whatever is your current vice to help ease the pain. 

You think twice, but do it anyway. 

Anything to make the thoughts and the pain go away. 

See, the thing about ADD is that you have all these crazy wonderful ideas. Creative projects, business ideas, you constantly think outside of the box. But, because you can’t focus on just one thought long enough, none of it, or only part of it gets accomplished. 

If I had all my thoughts I have, but were able to focus on each one and give it the correct amount of time, I’d be on top of my dream world. I’d be a paid writer, I would be inspiring as many people as possible, and I could enjoy down time when it is given to me. But, I have ADD and my medication doesn’t cure it, but makes it bareable. 



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