mental health, Uncategorized

Just When I Thought I Was Getting Better (And A Letter To My Support System)

Last night I walked into my pharmacy holding my breath. I never got a call or text saying that my prescriptions were ready, and I was afraid. Turns out, one script was ready. However, the one I need was not even delivered today. Great. 

It’s a scary feeling not knowing when you’re going to be getting a much needed prescription. I’m almost out, I have enough to last one day if I take it correctly. But, I’ll try and make it last two days. So, that means tonight I will probably have an anxiety attack as it leaves my system. It beats not having it at all tomorrow. 

But, what if I don’t get it tomorrow? What if I have to go without? I haven’t been on this medication long. The way I feel when it stops working for the day is bad enough, what happens when I can’t take it for several days? Will I go through withdrawals? Maybe I’ll have to go to the hospital. Who knows. 

Dear friends and people who support me,

Please, be patient with me the next few days. As I am currently scared to death. I don’t know when I’ll get my refill, I don’t know what will happen if I can’t take it. 

My anxiety is high right now. I grew up watching my mother suffer withdrawals from not having her medication on time. I don’t want to go through that, but I’m afraid it’s a possibility. I’m terrified, I live alone, how will I function?

I ask you, please check on me. Make sure I’m alright. Notice my facebook posts, do they seem off to you? Let me know. 

I will try to get through this best I can. But, without your support it’s near impossible. Please, be the supportive voices I need to make it through this. If this does get bad, I’ll need you desperately. If it doesn’t get bad, then celebrate and thank God with me. 

Pray with me. Pray for me. Send good vibes my way. And hope that I do not have to suffer in pain because someone else doesn’t have their shit together. 



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